The Ring Master of the Let's Pretend Circus

So, a few years ago I went to the Puyallup Fair with my kids. There was a great little tent called “The Let’s Pretend Circus” where kids could dress up as tight rope walkers, lions, tigers, bears, sharpshooters, etc and put on a circus for the delight of their parents. This was all led by a Ring Master, who artfully paraded gads of children through their performance with the “greatest of ease”.

This Ring Master, I must tell you, was absolutely delightful. He was great with the kids and charming and very, very handsome.

I had been celibate for some time, so the affect that he had on me was probably exaggerated, but I went home and raved on and on about this Ring Master to my roommate Kris. Of course, I was going to do nothing about this because it was just a passing thing and obviously hormonally driven.

To my chagrin, Kris went to the fair the next day and approached this Ring Master and had the audacity to give him my business card. I was horrified. Especially so when she told me that he had a girlfriend. I, of course, did not hear from him and the embarrassment eventually subsided.

Six months later I received an email through my business email address with the subject line “Remember Me?” We emailed back and forth, escalating things bit by bit until our next meeting was inevitable, and that meeting would obviously include something of a sexual tone……

So, I took the time that I had left when I still had a brain to set up some ground rules. These rules were actually listed in a bulleted form and I really needed him to agree to them before things went further. I can’t remember all of the rules, but here are some….

He could not be allowed to know my children or hang out at my house.
He could not call or email excessively.
He could not expect anything of me.
I needed to have a set “date” at least once a week that did not interfere with my children’s schedule.

Needless to say, he was more than happy to oblige. (Every man’s dream – sex with no strings attached. Not a bad deal.) We set up a rolling date for every Tuesday at 10 a.m. and it was great – sideshow, circus freak, center ring fabulous!

We have diverged our lives on and off for a few years, and I have once again been emailing and talking to him. It is nice – a comfortable place to be where I know the rules will be followed.

Circus freaks beat celibacy every time!