Thursday, November 03, 2005

If Only It Was That Easy

I had a moment of weakness last night.

You know how I said I am over the lonely thing? Well, I am....mostly. But then certain things happen, and you realize how handy and nice and sweet it is to have someone with testes living under your roof.

There was a yucky bug in my kitchen last night.

Yep. Really yucky. And relatively fast. The worst kind.

You can't just ignore them. Although that was my first instinct. "If I don't look at it, it was never there." But, it was there. And there is no telling where it would end up. So....I got my shoe and smooshed it.

It crunched a little.

And stuck to the floor instead of my shoe.

Which means I had to pick it up with a paper towel to dispose of it.

Which caused me to gag and almost throw up.

And I did all this while helping my daughter with her math homework and trying to keep the whole "there-is-a-huge-crunchy-bug-in-our-house-that-is-now-stuck-to-the-floor" thing under wraps so as not to freak out aforementioned daughter.

Multitask, anyone?

I did it. But I did not like it.

I need an "Insta-Man" or something.

Just add water! Goes from a packet of powder to bug killing hunk of manly goodness in less than 3 seconds!
Guaranteed to turn back to powder after the job is done and before he eats all the food in the fridge!
On Sale Now!


At 10:44 AM, Blogger KOM said...

Reminds me of the Can-O-Man from the animated The Tick program from a few years back. I'd say good idea, but I think I should be offended... :)

At 12:02 PM, Blogger Sherri said...

Please....when you market this put me as first on the list to get one! :)

At 12:02 PM, Blogger Sherri said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

At 12:53 PM, Blogger anika said...

I'll buy one too!

At 3:28 PM, Blogger Shari said...

KOM, don't be offended. Be honored that I would want to invent something in your image... Or was that God... Now I'm all confused...

At 8:42 AM, Blogger PVPeeved said...

Will he go to work for me? Then I can stay home w/ Insta-Chick...

Maybe not, my luck Insta-Man & Insta-Chick hookup and I still have to go into work. Damn.


At 1:04 PM, Blogger rich bachelor said...

Well, and it's not just our childlike love of smashy smashy that gets us teste-haulin' types into activities like bug removal. It's also the sick thrill of taking lives.
I'm not familiar with your friends around here: is PVPeeved a salesperson of Photo Voltaic Panels, or someone who was Personally Vindicated, Posthumously?

At 1:17 PM, Blogger Shari said...

Dear rich-bug-smooshing-bachelor,

I do not know mr. pvpeeved. It was his first time commenting.

Mr. PVP'd? Please...tell us more about yourself....


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