Friday, April 07, 2006

Buttwacky

There is this certain guy at work that has my inactive libido doing flip-flops. It's spring. I try to avoid men (therefore no sex) so there are times when my body just takes over.

Take, for instance, last week at the departmental meeting. I came in late. The only seat available was either right beside him or behind. I sat behind.

And stared at his neck for three hours.

I sat there and fantasized about what his neck would smell like. Should I bite it? I bet he would smell great. Should I just lean up really close and inhale deeply? And then bite?

Damn. He is emitting the phermones that directly correspond with my chemical makeup or something.

And he is married. And I am leaving him totally alone. But anyway....

He was sitting at my desk helping me with something yesterday (and the biting, sniffing thing was almost unstoppable). My co-worker pretty much agrees with me about the phermone thing, but she does not want to smell him, instead she has a thing for voices. So, when he left, she sent me this email...

That is one incredible voice! sigh………..

and then

How are things smelling over there? :)

to which I responded:

None of your beeswax. Jealous.

and a few minutes later I added:

I don’t seem to be able to remember what he just told me.

I need him over here. STAT! ~swoon~

And then we both received this email from our supervisors SUPERVISOR:

As you go about your day looking for information on the HR pages of Snaplink and you see something that needs to be fixed, can you please email me with it? I started a list. Example: I just went out to find some information on Long Term Care and went to the Alpha List and its not under “L”.

Basically a normal email from your boss asking you to do something, right?

Okay, so Candice reads it, then goes back to my email (or so she thinks) and writes back:

You’re driving me buttwacky!

To which our bosses boss replies:

What is buttwacky? (new term to me in 51 years….)

And after laughing for a good 30 minutes....laughing so hard that we both had our heads on our desks and our bodies were shaking uncontrollably and we were doing that "silent laughing and crying all at the same time thing", Candace emails our big boss back with this:

I’m so sorry. It was a joke to Shari and I must have accidentally sent it to you! If you want to know, it is a term my mother used to use with my sisters and I and has been a family joke ever since.

Heck, if I know what it means!

And the best thing about it is at the end of the day she (the big boss) came into our office and said:

You guys are driving me buttwacky with all this laughing!

It was absolutely priceless. See what trouble men can cause?



7 Comments:

At 9:32 AM, Blogger Ant said...

A whole lot more trouble if the preceding conversation got sent too... :o)

 
At 10:58 AM, Blogger Nikol said...

That is so funny!!

And I agree, sometimes those phermones need to be connected to the available men...and while we're wishing...to men we don't work with, or work for, or who grade our Thesis papers, etc. You get my point.

 
At 12:16 PM, Blogger Shari said...

Oh, I am SO smelling what you're cookin'....

 
At 7:29 PM, Blogger rennratt said...

Ahhh. The idea of laughing to tears over a spring crush is priceless. Having to explain it to your boss? I am crying on your behalf!

I have to avoid certain male coworkers BECAUSE they smell so good!

 
At 10:25 PM, Blogger Olivia said...

My friend and I had one of those shared giggly crushes a few years ago. A Canadian ski instructor. We felt like we were 12 although we were about 27 at the time. AND we both had partners back home. It was just SO MUCH FUN winding each other up and giggling about it.

 
At 2:12 AM, Blogger Squishi said...

My whole ex-office had a thing for a guy who was sitting in payroll for a while. He was single (none of us were) but we'd have a "daily whereabouts/tie colour" report. Dreamy. He moved down to another office in the city and we all went into depression mode, cos there was no one to replace him who was so bite-worthy.

*sigh*

 
At 7:21 AM, Blogger melissa.in.london said...

*ahem*

Even you, Shari, are a victim of twitterpation.

You know what I'm talking about.

*winks*

 

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