Tradition

My family has some messed up holiday traditions.

Messed-up Holiday Tradition #1

Not only do you leave milk and cookies out for Santa, but you also leave blue mush out for the reindeer. Those poor things are doing all the work anyway. Here is my reindeer food recipe....

some water in a pot

some sort of gruelish-type stuff

Boil water. Add some kind of gruelish type stuff. Cook till coagulated. Stir in copious amounts of blue food coloring. Place in bowl outside or if you live in the country on a farm or a ranch, put it in the hay loft.

picture these really blue......

(PS - I find grits to be the best gruelish-type stuff because it is white and ends up being the purty-est color of blue.)

You may ask, "Why blue?" Well, I have no idea. My Grandpa Lars made this up I think. Or it's an ancient Norwegian tradition. Just go with it.

Messed-up Holiday Tradition #2

Little Christmas Eve.

Once again, I think Grandpa Lars made this up. He liked the holidays and concocted ways to elongate them if possible.

Legend has it that the day before Christmas Eve - December 23rd - is celebrated with family, food and lots of wine. He chose an amazing vintage every year - usually Ernest and Julio Gallo in the gallon jugs with the twist off lids.

Yep. Sigh.

Anyway, you must dine on fine Norwegian delicacies including, but not limited to...

1. Lefse (Norwegian tortillas)





2. pickled herring (pickled fish is surprisingly good on Ritz crackers, plus, it's brain food)





3. Kumla (some sort of soupish stuff that I always hated)




Ummm..mine was more soupish - and without the elves.



4. Lutefisk (Fish jello - that's all I have to say about that)





5. And fish eggs that you squeeze out of toothpaste-type tubes. (I liked this too. I CAN'T HELP IT! I WAS EXPOSED AT A YOUNG AGE PEOPLE!)

I no longer serve lutefisk or kumla on Little Christmas Eve. I replace it with something more acceptable, like clam chowder. This way my friends will still come to my house. But I won't lie to you, I sneak some pickled fish and toothpaste fish eggs when no one is looking.

Messed-up Holiday Tradition #3

I don't have to do this anymore, but I would.

Always feed the animals early and well on Christmas morning.

My Dad would feed our cows on our ranch the best bales of alfalfa on Christmas. He was such a softie.

Messed-up Holiday Tradition #4

My mom would always make us get dressed up and brush our hair and teeth and stuff before we got to open presents. She wanted charming and adorable Christmas pictures.

I, on the other hand, don't make my kids even change out of their PJ's on Christmas. What's the use? (I do eventually make them brush their teeth. The thank you kisses can get pretty horrid otherwise.)

So? Anyone else with messed-up holiday traditions?

**all images found by Google images - I claim none of these beauties for my own.